Hints and Tips in Lesbian Dating 101

If there was a course on lesbian dating we reckon the syllabus might look a little like this ...

Biology
If you are a lesbian, it's always a good start to get the biology aspect right. You’re a woman, she's a woman, class dismissed to have fun in the playground.

Of course, she may have been a he or been with a he previously, which might complicate things a little - mostly by bringing in those pesky social sciences - but we don't take any points away for late comers and we always encourage extra credits for effort.

Chemistry
While we don't encourage getting over excited with the Bunsen burners or shaking up weird and wonderful liquids in conical flasks, we must emphasise the need for good chemistry.

If there is no chemistry, you are in a friendship. Please go the social sciences class down the hall for more details.

If there is chemistry then you will feel your tummy tingle. You will feel a lump in your throat when you want to speak. You will want to tear off each other's clothes and set off all sorts of reactions.

However, we do ask that you do this somewhere other than this classroom. All that kinetic energy gets too close to the physics syllabus.

Physics
Energy. Lots of it. Changing from one form of energy to another. Several times in one date if you are lucky. And you thought physics was boring, huh?

Maths
None of your complicated maths though. We strongly believe in keeping things simple, so let's just look at some nice plain arithmetic. 1 + 1 = 2. Got that?

1 + 1 does not equal 1. You are not 2 halves of a whole. You are a whole being with a whole being's brains and body and personality. And hopefully your dating partner will also have all of those things.

1 + 1 does not equal more than 2. At least not if you want a relationship. You are a whole being with whole being needs and wants and desires. You deserve to have the whole attention of your date - and she deserves yours. At least for the duration of the date.

English
Conversation is good. English is fairly global one way or another. Those whose first language is English are lazy but it also helps other folks enhance their skills to have a second language in their repertoire.

Be prepared to use language in a variety of ways.

Comedy - a shared sense of humour is a wonderful thing.

Drama - you are lesbians, you know it's going to be in the mix.

Communication is a necessity. This is the first of many, many, many English classes.

Other Languages
See English. But read it aloud with a sexy accent.

Music
There is music everywhere. Although hopefully not blaring out at 2am when all you want to do is go to sleep. We don't take kindly to someone's bassline vibrating the hell out of our foundations, thank you very much.

When dating, it's important to pay attention to what kind of music your dating partner likes. By the end of the first date ask yourself if you could share a CD shelf with her. Would you have doubles? Would you have to make room for some new titles? Would you rather listen to dogs howl rather than hear anymore?

Lesbians do road trips - consider this music class carefully.

Art
After a few dates, check out each other's living spaces. What kind of photographs and pictures are on display? You can tell a lot by just looking around.

Write a 1000 word essay on your own space first - what does it tell you about yourself?

Home Economics
At least one of you has to be able to cook.

Sewing and knitting and laundry and everything else can somehow be figured out but food is one of life's necessities and no, you cannot live on take-out menu offerings forever.

Also, if you ever want to have a family, it's good to get some grounding in the basics. Also consider Biology class.

Woodwork and Metalwork
Strictly speaking you can get away without this class. But it can be handy.

And if you fail at Chemistry class you can take this class and be that ever friendly, ever popular best friend who can fix anything up with just one little Philips screwdriver!

Accounting
Lesbians are not generally known for having loads of money. Typically women earn less than men and with precious little tax breaks in places where there is no gay marriage nor civil union legislation, well, there tends to be a lot of money going out but not so much coming in.

So, learn to budget and make that money go further! Maybe the next date will be at that fancy restaurant where you want to check out their take-out options.

Computing
As of this year we are just going to call this class what it really is: Online dating!

Play nice!